When I had to leave my teaching job in February due to all that was going on, I really thought I wouldn’t be going back into teaching. At least not for a few years. I had a deep, grief-like sadness that I couldn’t explain. I would dream about it. I would wake up extremely sad. This did NOT help my depression. I felt that because I had left (again), I ruined all chances of getting a job again.
I tried to keep myself busy. I began putting all of my energy into running. I tried starting an organization business. I poured myself into my childbirth education class. But none of it was what I felt called to.
I’m a teacher. Nothing will change that. I have wanted to teach since I was in first grade, and that has never gone away.
It is my calling. It is my passion.
Though it is not my identity.
Through this season of life, I had to learn that. I am passionate about and called to teaching, but my identity is in Christ. Alone.
No matter how hard I tried, it looked as though teaching would not be happening this coming year.
I finally gave in to that and decided that maybe God wanted me to take more time away. I decided to sub. I decided to work with the PTA. I decided to just immerse myself in my kids’ school as a parent. I was completely content with that. I knew that if God wanted me to teach, He would open the right door. And it wasn’t happening (no matter how hard I tried to force my way into doors that weren’t meant for me to go through).
There’s more to this story. God heard my prayers. He saw the desires of my heart. He created me with a passion for teaching, and He wants me to be able to be the teacher I feel called to be.
A few weeks ago, I received a message on Facebook from an acquaintance of mine asking if I would be interested in teaching at a private school. An hour later, I received a phone call from a parent telling me all about the school (amazing things). I emailed the principal, had two interviews, and the rest is history. I have been hired to be a 4th grade Reading/Language Arts teacher at a beautiful, growing private school. Everyone that I have met so far has been so amazing. The Head of School told me that she had such peace in her heart about me.
That’s exactly how I feel about this school. I will be making less than I did in the public school, but I just don’t care. It’s enough to provide for our needs. I’m not teaching to make money… I’m teaching because I love it so much.
I’m so excited to have a new beginning. To start fresh in a new school. To be surrounded by Christ followers. To have the love of God all around me, every day that I step foot there. To me, that’s worth more than any money can buy. And I get to do what I love.
After months of extreme difficulty, hard work, and growing closer to my Savior, I get to start fresh again.
Praise. The. Lord.