July 17, 2017 by Courtney
“Hyperventilation syndrome (HVS); also chronic hyperventilation syndrome (CHVS) and dysfunctional breathing hyperventilation syndrome is a respiratory disorder, psychologically or physiologically based, involving breathing too deeply or too rapidly (hyperventilation). HVS may present with chest pain and a tingling sensation in the fingertips and around the mouth (paresthesia) and may accompany a panic attack.
People with HVS may feel that they cannot get enough air. In reality, they have about the same oxygenation in the arterial blood (normal values are about 98% for hemoglobin saturation) and too little carbon dioxide(hypocapnia) in their blood and other tissues.”
I’ve had this twice before, lasting 3 months and 1 month. This time it has lasted about 1 month so far (though it has been more off and on this time).
I’m thankful for my hubby. I have spent a lot of time trying to figure out WHY I’m anxious. I’ve been thinking that there has to be a reason, and it must be my fault. I must have done something to cause it. But he reminded me that I have generalized anxiety disorder and it’s a chemical imbalance. I will have anxiety just because. I don’t have to have a reason, and it’s definitely not my fault. I can do things to help, and I am being proactive. Tomorrow I’ll be getting blood work done, going to AA, and going to counseling. I’ll see my doctor in about a month. I’ll be taking some supplements as soon as I receive them from Amazon. Last night I meditated twice and that helped. I use these apps:
I’m also happy that I have continued to be present with my family despite this, and we have done lots of fun things! Poetry Teatime, I cooked a big dinner last night, we made Oobleck and homemade playdough yesterday, Levi and I played several games the other day, the kids have been crafting like crazy in our new craft/reading room, and last night we did independent reading as a family and Robert read aloud to the kids. All of this helps a ton because I’m not as focused on the anxiety (it’s still there while I’m doing all of this, but I’m not thinking about it as much).
I feel like this hyperventilation syndrome will last forever but Sue in my Parenting with Anxiety group reminded me a while back that it won’t. It just feels like it.
Like my counselor says, “feelings aren’t facts.” And what I say to myself matters!
Now on to supplements…
I have these supplements: Melatonin (I take these every night), B12, Cod liver oil, Garden of Life Vitamin Code, and Garden of Life Probiotics.
I ordered Vitamin D3.
I ordered Calm Magnesium but then found out that it isn’t absorbed well into the system and it tastes gross (it’s a powder that you mix with water), so I’ll be sending it back. My best friend ordered me some magnesium glycinate, which is the highest absorbed into the system, and it’s a tablet! I’m so thankful for her (I had found out about the Calm after it was too late to cancel and I am out of money for supplements… this is my birthday present from her!).
I did order Rescue Remedy candies (along with the Calm). These are alcohol free.
I will order a Super B complex when I run out of my B12 and Vitamin Code. I will probably also order some epsom salt because I’ve read and heard that it’s good for anxiety (it is magnesium!).
I listen to my Serenity Spa Music often during the day and especially at night, then switch to ocean sounds (white noise app) to sleep (I have done this for a long time).
Robert and I have decided that we will work on becoming caffeine free again. My counselor told me to do this a while back. We were almost there, then I started increasing my caffeine more and more and now I drink a lot of caffeine again.
Along those same lines, I’m going to switch from Coke Zero to only sparkling water (over time).
I also need to get back to being outside more. I can’t do major hikes because when I get out of breath it makes things harder for me, but walks are good.
I also pray a lot, but I struggle with this because I am kind of frustrated that God would allow me to suffer with anxiety so badly. I feel like my prayers are going unanswered.
Last night right before our reading time, it rained (for the first time in a long time), and I saw this beautiful rainbow out of my back windows/door.
It was a great reminder that God is with me. Even in the moments when I don’t understand why He allows things to happen, I can trust that He will use it for His glory.
The last 2 times this happened I took a LOT of Xanax. My previous doctor gave me 120 tablets at once and told me to take it every 4 hours! And he knew that I drank a lot because I told him and he did urine tests! Drinking and Xanax aren’t options anymore so I’m praying that the natural remedies and things will work!