Establishing Our Values and Goals as a Family

1

May 20, 2018 by Courtney

establishing values

I feel like I have so, so much to share and I don’t even know where to start!

Robert and I went to Big Bend State Park last weekend and it was so amazing and just what we needed for our marriage.  It was super hot (like 100 degrees during the day), but so worth it.  We just drank lots of water and didn’t end up doing much hiking like I hoped we would.  But it was amazing anyway!

Friday night we were at an amazing camp site.  The view was gorgeous and we had a picnic table and shelter.  We ate well (thanks to Trader Joe’s) and hung out and played games while listening to great music.  We talked a lot, which doesn’t happen as much as I would like these days.

That evening, I also did some reading in my new favorite book, Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis (mostly while Robert cooked dinner).  I hadn’t heard of her until recently but apparently she’s been around for a while.  The book is so encouraging and motivating… I’ll share about that in a bit.

Girl, Wash Your Face.jpeg

We played lots of games and it was so so great.

R & I

I actually didn’t sleep well at all that night.  Hammock camping isn’t my thing.  It was super comfy when I went to bed but over night I couldn’t get or stay comfy and froze (desert means hot during the day and cool at night).  It wasn’t actually that cold but I didn’t have anything under me for a while so the cold air was on my back.  I ended up moving to the Jeep early in the morning and slept a few hours.  Robert didn’t sleep well either!

Saturday was so so hot.  We drove around a ton looking at the park and that was super fun.  We took the Jeep Cherokee (a ’93) and couldn’t run the a/c because it was making it get too hot.  Haha.  So we drove around with the windows down.  The roads were 4wd only and were super rough.  We did walk/hike a bit.  Maybe 30 minutes?  And it was so so hot for me.  Having extra weight and being out of shape in general made a huge difference and made it more difficult.  And honestly if I just worked on conditioning my body more, the extra weight wouldn’t be a big deal.

We got to see a cave painting with handprints, an old house on a trail leading to a spring, a lot of pretty desert flowers and even a green tree, and just lots of awesome similar scenery.

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We also spent so much more time talking about things… dreams and aspirations.  Values. Goals.  Changes.  Living the way we want to despite challenges.  Reminders that living the way we want will maybe help with those challenges.  Not only did we walk while we drove, we talked while we played games that night.  I did more reading from Rachel’s book and it helped us in our discussion.  I just loved it so much.  (and we slept in a tent which was much better)

Here are a few things that stood out to me as I was reading:

Book 4

Book 3

Book 1

Book 2

I’ll keep it simple with a list of things we discussed:

  • We want to get back to few processed foods again (not 100%, but mostly).  Whole grains, healthy fats, protein, fruits/veggies, some dairy.  More homemade again.  I’m slowly working on reducing my soda intake.  I have been working on this for a while. I am trying to be balanced about this, but I know that sodas have been affecting my health for quite some time.  This isn’t changing things a TON as I have always loved making homemade foods (Greek yogurt, whole wheat bread, muffins, granola, dinners, etc), but I am going to reduce things like pop tarts, cereal, cookies, etc in addition.  I refuse to cut out any food group or food in general.  I’m working on eating what makes me feel good!
  • We are working towards using natural products and cleaners again as well.  This started last month when I got my first Grove Collaborative box and remembered how much I love natural products.  Yesterday I ordered a few more cleaners, some deodorant for Robert (he has major issues with deodorant) and I, shampoo, conditioner, body wash, etc from Grove.  The prices are pretty good!
  • I bought some fun stuff at HEB yesterday!  I’ll write a Grocery Geek post next!
  • Some things are non-negotiable like our meds, and I can’t use many essential oils because I have discovered that they are what has caused my cough (well, mainly when I diffuse them).
  • We miss backpacking and camping and we need to do a LOT more of it as a family.  This is a huge thing that we will change.  I didn’t realize how much I missed it till this past weekend.
  • MOVEMENT.  This is the big habit that I’m working on right now through Balance 365.  My goal is daily movement of any kind, but I’m trying to get as many hikes in as I can in order to prepare for backpacking once again.  This week was only once so far, but I’m just going to keep working on it.  The other days were things like walking to the dining hall and back, cleaning the house for hours, and grocery shopping.
  • We are not going to focus on going to church for now.  We have struggled with some theological issues or other disagreements at most of the churches that we have tried and have decided that camp is our “church” home (because biblically the church isn’t a building, it’s the people).  It’s where we fellowship and study God’s word (along with our personal studies).  We want to get back to going to worship services here.  We know many people will disagree, and I’m okay with that.  This is where we are landing for now.  We will also try to focus on making sure we are teaching the kids because while some people make the church the sole teacher of the Bible to their kids, we feel that it is our responsibility as their parents.  This is the first time that we have truly communicated our desires and views so I’m just happy that we are in agreement.  Apparently this is what Robert has felt all along but we haven’t always been the best at communicating.  We’re working on it.  Tomorrow the kids and I will do some study and worship while Robert is working.
  • It’s okay for me to have dreams about things!  It’s okay if I want to try really hard to work up to black status with Younique!  It’s okay to want great things!  I don’t even care about the money completely, but I love the fact that I have goals to meet!  Next is Pink status!
  • I have changed and grown so so much this year.  It has been fantastic.  I am taking it one day at a time still, but I feel like this year has been what I have been needing.  Consistently feeling well for the first time in years and years.
  • Robert is trying to figure out how to work less.  It has always been an issue for him, and if he doesn’t slow down now, he will burn out.  That’s the last thing that we want because we LOVE it here.  The goal, also, is for him to do some things that he enjoys like rock climbing, mountain biking, etc.  He hasn’t been taking good care of himself and it has affected every area of his life.
  • I actually wore tanks last weekend without a shirt on top AND I didn’t wear two shirts like I normally do.  As I’m becoming more comfortable in my body, I am getting out of my comfort zone.  It’s so freeing.

When Robert got home yesterday and I was telling him about the stuff that I bought at the store, he said, “is it weird that I’m excited about us becoming ‘crunchy’ again?”  It made me so happy to hear that.  He used to get annoyed about it but having gone the other direction hasn’t been great for our physical health.  For me the goal for years was mental health.  Now that I’m there I can focus on physical health.  I’ve been physically healthy off and on, but I want sustainable and that is happening with Balance 365 habit forming.  Also, I haven’t ever been mentally healthy, and I think it took that before I could find a sustainable way to be physically healthy.

Life is so so good.  I’m thankful for where we are and where we are headed.  Lots of family adventure awaits!

One thought on “Establishing Our Values and Goals as a Family

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